It's been an exciting week: On Tuesday, Israel approved my visa and now Barry, my new boss, is expecting me in Jerusalem around June 13. But airline tickets cost money, and I currently have none. My Israel fundraiser launched weeks ago and as of this writing, the contributions are still at $0.
But am I worried? Absolutely not. Because this whole journey is the Lord's, and he has promised to provide what I need WHEN I NEED IT ... sometimes not a moment before. So when I need to buy plane tickets, the money will be there. I know He already has the people who will donate all lined up and ready.
This is NOT to say that I don't have moments of anxiety. I definitely have moments of anxiety. Like in the middle of the night, or first thing in the morning when I realize I am one day closer to Israel but still don't SEE how I am possibly going to get there.
But standing in the middle of my bedroom is an empty, black suitcase which stands as a constant reminder of my Lord's provision for me. The Lord used that suitcase (and it's mismatched green brother) in a 9-month-long exercise to teach me patience, obedience and trust, and miraculously returned them to me from faraway Colorado Springs early last month - and it didn't cost me a dime!
Here's the story: Last summer I found myself stranded in Colorado and realized my best option was to - somehow - get back to Phoenix. At the time, I had the vague notion that it would involve packing up my Honda and returning to Colorado Springs, but the Lord had other plans.
So with two days to go before I was out of the Lodge with nowhere to stay, I asked my new friend, Cynthia to drive me to a pawn shop to pawn my wedding rings so I could buy a plane ticket home.
Turns out somewhere along the way, the diamonds had been replaced with junk so all i got was just enough money to purchase a one-way ticket home but not enough for checked bags.
I thought, "I don't have money for the bags, and besides, I'm packing my Honda and driving it back next month, right? I can go without my laptop, and all my clothes, shoes, toiletries, CPAP and favorite pillow for a few weeks, right?"
So I left my two suitcases with Cindy and Dave, two very nice people who I had met at the Lodge and barely knew, and my Bible college friend Cynthia agreed to hang onto my laptop and my Nutribullet for a few weeks. A few weeks, right?!? Well, as I mentioned earlier, the Lord had other plans, and a few weeks turned into months and months... and months.
As a result of my Meltdown in Monument, I had told the Lord I was done doing things my way, and He was now in charge. Soon after returning to Phoenix I spent an entire afternoon contemplating Matthew 6:25-34 which ends "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
This was clearly a lesson He wanted me to learn; to rely on Him for my daily needs, be thankful for what I had, take care of what was before me that day, and leave the rest in His capable hands. I would often end the day laying in bed, in tears, listing off the little that I did have and thanking the Lord for having a place to sleep that night.
Since my original plan for Colorado was to get a job there, I had packed all my work clothes, shoes and anything of value, all of which was now sitting with strangers a thousand miles away. In fact, the only pair of pants I had for the entire nine months was the one pair of gray dress pants I wore on the flight back to Arizona last summer.
I did find an old pair of jeans back at the house, but when they developed a huge hole next to the back pocket, my daughter made me throw them away. Ok, so we're back to one pair of pants. Another time, a friend used some of her Kohls cash and bought me a pair of black dress pants. I washed them once and the seams exploded. Literally. After that, I figured the Lord wanted me to be OK with the pair of pants I had and it was better to just not push my luck.
This became a running joke (sort of) with my family and friends. Every once in awhile Cynthia would call and ask if I wanted my laptop back yet. I would reassure her that I was trusting the Lord and when he provided the money or some other way to get the computer and my suitcases back to me, I would be sure to let her know. The last time she asked was three or four days before the Lord's answer came:
I had coffee with Teresa Alvarado, a gal from church. My daughters Megan and Kaitlyn had often babysat their four small children, and Teresa had always been a positive, godly influence in the girls' lives, so when it looked like I was headed to Israel and my girls were staying here, I thought maybe Teresa would be one of the people the Lord would use in Megan and Kaitlyn's life in my absence.
So Teresa and I spent time getting to know each other, and it was the beginning of a wonderful friendship. Towards the end of the conversation, Teresa mentioned that they had exciting news: Her husband's family had purchased a van for them with room for all four car seats for their kids. She had found cheap tickets so they were all flying out on March 31, would spend spring break there with family, and then drive their new van back to Phoenix. How exciting, I thought, and asked where his family lived?
Colorado Springs .... the van was in Colorado Springs. Hmmm. My suitcases were in Colorado Springs. My laptop was in Woodland Park (just outside Colorado Springs). Hmmm. Seems like a God-thing to me. "So Teresa, do you think you would have room in your new van for two suitcases? Because I have to tell you this story...."
So Teresa met Dave and Cindy and got my suitcases, met Cynthia and got my laptop (and other wonderful goodies, thank you, Cynthia!!!) and it didn't cost me a dime. It was the biggest, LONGEST lesson in trusting the Lord I've ever been through, and He was faithful.
Lesson: What I need when I need it. Sometimes didn't see where an answer or provision could possibly come from, right up until the very last minute. But it was always there. If it was a NEED, it was provided. Now the WANTS.... well, still waiting on a lot of those, but come to think of it, there aren't really many WANTS anymore.
When the Lord fills you up, "stuff" doesn't matter as much. When you live for nine months with one pair of good pants, the other "wants" start to look a little silly.
Comments