So how does a former "Baptist pastor's wife" with four children - who's never been much of anywhere - suddenly end up in Israel?
Looking back, I have always loved Israel. The history, people, prophecy... the stories of fearless, absolute reliance upon their God when through them He accomplished amazing things. And his mercy and compassion when their humanity and pride got them in trouble... I can so relate to their stories throughout scripture. Real people, real struggles, and a very real God who chose them, provided for them, and dearly loves them.
Born Too Late
When I was in Jr. High, I read Corrie Ten Boom's book, The Hiding Place. I remember feeling angry, incensed, empty. I wanted to help... to hide Jewish families in my house... to fight for them. And I would have too. But I was born too late.
Years later, I learned of godly men like Dietrich Bonhoeffer who spoke truth, boldly stood up to Adolf Hitler and the Nazi propaganda machine, and was executed in a concentration camp. I had that same empty feeling... like I had missed an opportunity. I was born too late.
So imagine my surprise last summer when, after my Meltdown in Monument, I began to actively seek out God's purpose for my life and voila: Israel quickly became front and center.
One of the first things I did - after getting to church that first Sunday in Colorado - was to immerse myself in the Word and seek out Godly counsel.
Finding My Purpose
I found a free audio teaching series on Andrew Wommack's website called "How to Find God's Will." It sounded relevant, so I listened to the first segment: Everyone Has a Destiny.
It was like Andrew had followed me around the last five years (or more) and was sharing his personal observations of my struggles...even going so far as to use phrases I'd used myself, such as feeling like a "square peg in a round hole" and reclassifying the depression & restlessness I'd felt as "holy dissatisfaction." Tears rolled down my face and I shook with sobs throughout that first "listen."
For the first time in a long time, I felt hopeful.
I listened to the rest of that series, as well as the following series, How to Follow God's Will and How to Fulfill God's Will.
As I put into practice the principles I was learning, I began to immerse myself in the Word and seek out what it was that God had 'hardwired' into me from early on... Well, try as I might the only two things I could come up with were a love of books & reading, and ISRAEL.
That's great, Lord! I know I love Israel... but the purpose of this exercise is to get me a J.O.B.
So we need to come up with marketable skills here (reading through the lines you might catch on that "dying to self" has been a HUGE part of this process for me. At this point I was still - unintentionally - working off my old agenda).
The Lord and I would persevere on another week and after more self-evaluation....... had we discovered anything new? Nope, still just books and Israel. Hmmm.
So one day in early August I was mulling this over in my head and praying for some wisdom, and suddenly this thought "popped" into my head: "Hey! Maybe I am one of the Gentiles God is raising up to help restore his people to the land of Israel!"
[LONG pause] Wait..... What?!? Is God raising up Gentiles to help Israel? Does He ever plan to raise up Gentiles? Do Jews even like or talk to Christians?
I was not sure what to do with this, but ok ... that was different ... and sort of interesting! I guess God will tell me what that means when I'm ready.
So Israel-related things began to happen:
Late in August, I began watching various Messianic programs on our Roku, particularly Zola Levitt Presents and Jewish Voice Ministries which is headquartered here in Phoenix. I felt strongly that I should start learning Hebrew, so I cashed in my remaining Audible credits and got Pimsleur's audio Modern Hebrew course. (I am still on lesson 6 - a very slow learner to say the least!)
For Such a Time As This
Around that time, I also went for coffee with Katherine, a messianic friend I'd met last spring at a trade show. I was supposed to be helping my friend cover HER booth, but saw the star of david and other jewish "stuff" at the table across the aisle and was drawn like a magnet (yup - always loved Israel) where I met Katherine and Fern. You will hear lots about these two amazing ladies in upcoming posts!
Anyway, at coffee I told Katherine about my travails in Colorado and at the end of my story, she pulled a box out of her purse and slid it across the table. She told me, "I saw this on the kitchen counter as I was leaving the house and the Lord said this is for you." It was a small bottle of "Queen Esther" anointing oil from the holy land, "For such a time as this." I didn't realize it then, but that was quickly to become the subtitle for this journey I am on... "For such a time as this..."
I began to anoint myself daily with Queen Esther oil, affirming that I am a living sacrifice bought with the precious blood of Yeshua and I am available "for such a time as this." (It was around this time that my mom was diagnosed with an advanced case of stomach cancer.)
Early in October, I was sitting in a doctor's waiting room with a sick daughter when a strange alarm went off on my phone. I looked and there was a pop-up window notifying me that this was the first night of the Jewish Feast of Tabernacles (or Sukkot).
Since I was bored, I shot off a quick text to Katherine and asked her if the messianic congregation was doing anything for the Feast of Tabernacles. Turns out they were, and there was food involved!!!
So on the first night of Sukkot 2014, I ended up in a parking lot in the west valley of Phoenix, sitting under a shelter with a roof of palm branches learning about this important Jewish feast, and I have been attending Shabbat (sabbath) services ever since.
One day around this time, I was picking up around the house, praying for wisdom and guidance as I went. As I passed through the living room, this thought "blasted" through my head: "Maybe I love Israel because God's got a job for me there."
I stopped dead in my tracks, pondered this a moment, hmmmmmm... laughed out loud - REALLY - and to my amazement, my only response was, "Hey, cool, I think I might be going to Israel! That will be SOOOO fun to see how God's gonna do THAT ONE!!!!" (I talk a little about how that all happened in My Call to ICEJ.)
Coming Full Circle
One particularly memorable episode of Zola Levitt Presents was an episode about the New Gate in Jerusalem, where Myles Weiss interviewed Jan Willem Van Der Hoeven. With his connection to Corrie Ten Boom, his words seemed to bring me full-circle, back to the beginning and rekindled those feelings I'd had in response to The Hiding Place all those years ago.
Only now I understand that our God makes NO mistakes. I wasn't born too late. THIS is my time in history. This is OUR time in history. You and me!
God divinely placed each one of us here for a purpose at this point in His plan. I wasn't Corrie Ten Boom or Dietrich Bonhoeffer. And that's ok. Their stories resonated with me because our passion and love for God and His people was the common thread between us.
Take a few minutes and listen to Jan Willem... and see if his words impact your heart like they did mine.
(At one point he turns and faces the camera - when I saw this, it felt like he was speaking directly to me and his words were seared into my heart.)
For Jan's clip, fast forward to 17:52:
With everything that has happened in the past six-nine months (and even just LAST WEEK!!!) involving Israel, Iran, Islam and the rise of anti-semitism, what is God calling YOU to do for his people? Will you be a Ruth?
I'd love to hear your thoughts!
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